Conflict in our lives is unavoidable unfortunately and how we choose to address it determines our level of effective communication. As I reflect on the conflicts I experience I am finding myself regurgitating and applying the information I am learning in this course. One of the strategies is being a better listener and to be empathetic by trying to see through the eyes of others while withholding any judgments I may have because of my perceptions and schemas. 

Another strategy involves the 3 Rs; respect, reciprocal, responsive and in my opinion, the most important is respect. Being respectful of others beliefs, allowing them to honesty express themselves without fear of repercussions is also vital to me because it keeps the lines of communication open whether the interaction is positive or negative in nature. 

Last, being willing to apologize, and even compromise for my part in the conflict, and initiate that communication rather than waiting for the other person(s). Doing so exhibits maturity and willingness to resolve that conflict quickly.

Does anyone have any other advice or input about what you have learned to be better communicators with regards to conflict resolution?that conflict quickly.

Evaluating My Communication Styles

Communication Anxiety, Verbal Aggressiveness, Listening Styles

     This week I and two people I chose took several tests to evaluate how I communicate. I chose to be evaluated by my daughter and one of my closest friends. I chose my daughter because she and I interact on a daily basis and she is somewhat sensitive so I was curious what her responses would be, especially in the Verbal Aggressiveness Scale. I chose my friend because she knows me very well and is willing to be honest in her evaluation.

     I was surprised to see the range of Communication Anxiety Inventory and that my friend’s score. She has seen me speak publicly on many occasions and even though I am very nervous and prefer not to speak, I have been told that no one can tell I am nervous.

    I learned that even though I that feel a bit uneasy in some communication situations and somewhat more confident in other contexts, I feel comfortable communicating in most situations and feel confident anticipating such encounters. 
     With regard to verbal aggressiveness I have a good balance between respect and consideration for others’ viewpoints, and the ability to argue fairly by attacking the facts of a position rather than the person holding that position. 
     Last, the Listening Styles profile was a little ambiguous but I feel I fall between group 2 and 3 respectively which are action and content oriented meaning I am business-like, prefer clear to the point communication that outlines a plan of action, and although my efficiency is respected but may intimidate more sensitive listeners. Also, I focus on detail and prefer to have all information before making a decision and will likely succeed  in classroom settings but struggle in more fast paced environments.

     I feel this is a fair assessment and it indicates that even though I am a good communicator I still need to improve on various communication skills that may impact my professional work and personal life.

Category	Dianna	Cookie	Dijone
*CAI (Communication Anxiety Inventory)	50	29	63
*LSP (Listening Styles Profile)	41	26	30
*VAS (Verbal Aggressiveness Scale)	63	62	53

*VAS-(53, 62, 63)

Moderate: You maintain a good balance between respect and consideration for others’ viewpoints, and the ability to argue fairly by attacking the facts of a position rather than the person holding that position.

*CAI-(29, 50, 43)

Low: You reported that you feel comfortable communicating in most situations and feel confident anticipating such encounters.

Mild: You reported that feel a bit uneasy in some communication situations and somewhat more confident in other contexts. Communication does not seem to be something you worry a great deal about.

Elevated: This range of scores indicates you feel uncomfortable in several communication contexts.

*LSP- Group 2 ( Action-Oriented), Group 3 (Content-Oriented)

Group 2- Business-like, prefer clear to the point communication that outlines a plan of action. Your efficiency is respected but may intimidate more sensitive listeners.

Group 3-You focus on detail and prefer to have all information before making a decision. You likely succeed  in classroom settings but struggle in more fast paced environments.

Competent communication is effective and appropriate for a given situation in which I, as a communicator will evaluate and reassess my own communication process and adjust my behavior to suit individuals and situations. I feel if I am to be a competent communicator, I must be able to do so with people from different groups and cultures. Some of the strategies I could use to help me communicate more effectively include the following:

·       Try to look at things from others eyes

·       Withhold judgment in order to gain a deeper understanding

·       Accept/embraces differences

·       Don’t assume that helping children will cripple their independence

·       Become consciously aware of nonverbal behaviors

·       Recognize your own patterns of nonverbal behaviors

·       Be sensitive

·       Don’t think that because you know a person’s culture you can predict their behavior

References

Gonzalez-Mena, J. (2010). 50 strategies for communicating and working with diverse families. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc."Understanding and Appreciating Cultural Differences" (pp. 36–38)"Looking at Nonverbal Communication Across Cultures" (pp. 80–81)

O'Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J.  (2015). Real communication (3rd. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.

Chapter 1, Communication: Essential Human Behavior

Nonverbal Communication-It Matters

                                               

I watched an episode of “Reba” first muted and then with the sound on. I was not sure what the relationship of the characters were with regards to being family but I know they were related or very good friends because they were in each other’s homes and people were walking in without knocking. A woman came in obviously upset based on her facial expressions and actions, and as I watched learned that it was because she thought she scratched her son’s new car that he cherished. Reba, along with the other ladies was trying to hide it but he found out and was very upset.

Based on the communication I observed when I watched with the sound on, I was correct in my assumptions about the car being scratched but it turned out to be Reba who did it although his mother and his wife also thought they scratched it.

My assumptions about the relationships would have been more correct because I would know the characters and their relationships with each other.
Nonverbal communication is, in my opinion, as important as verbal communication because you can’t have one without the other. Many times the nonverbal behaviors are more believable than verbal especially when channel discrepancy is evident.